Pregnancy and childbirth - the main event in the life of a woman
For nine months, she is amazedly watching how a new life develops inside her, joyfully listens to herself, anxiously awaits the miracle of the birth of a baby.
Joy, hope, impatience, the desire to squeeze their crumbs to the chest - with such feelings are the days and nights of the future mother.
But with a pure joyful expectation, a muddy wave of fear is often mixed. What awaits me ahead? Why am I so afraid of pregnancy and childbirth? What if I can not cope with the baby? And if something happens to him or to me? Such thoughts often arise in young women who are waiting for their first child. And this is quite natural, because everything new, the unknown always causes excitement and fear.
Everybody is afraid, it's ok. But all give birth too: not a single lady has yet remained pregnant beyond the deadline set by nature. And to give birth is absolutely not scary. Not before.
Why am I afraid of pregnancy and childbirth? Main fears
Why is pregnancy so scary? Mainly because it is a certain psychological line. A young woman says goodbye to youth, carelessness. The time comes to take responsibility for another person, so defenseless, tiny, beloved.
Pathological fear occurs when panic begins at the thought of a possible pregnancy. Girls are afraid to spoil the shape, lose their attractiveness. Pregnancy often causes thoughts of inevitably approaching old age, possible illness, and gestation. Most of all fears of childbirth cause:
• pain;
• possible complications;
• death.
Of course, labor is accompanied by pain. It must be taken, as it is a natural consequence of the birth of a child. Another thing that people suffer pain in different ways. Therefore, women with a low pain threshold suffer more than women who are good at coping with pain. They, going "after the second", do not stop complaining: I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth ... Well, what can I advise? First of all - tune in. Yes, it will hurt, but it is a necessary, good pain. It shows that everything is in order, the child is alive and is about to be born. But what a great relief, what an incredible happiness the mother will experience when the obstetrician places a little treasure on her breast! She will instantly forget about the pain, and the day of birth will be for her one of the most precious memories.
Anesthesia during labor - a valid option. But the decision about the possibility of anesthesia should be made in conjunction with a gynecologist. And you can also arrange for the presence at birth of a husband or mother. The support of a loved one really helps to reduce physical pain. It is not necessary to be afraid that the husband will lose sexual interest after seeing the painful process of having a baby. First, he will not see anything special, since he should be allowed to stand at the head of the bed. And secondly, a man touches the great mystery of the emergence of life; he will appreciate more, love both mother and child.
Fear of possible complications associated with the complete helplessness of a woman who is on the generic table. As anaesthesiologists say, just relax and trust. The habit of controlling everything plays an important role in the formation of such fear. But in fact, you just need to completely trust the doctors. Next to the pregnant woman are an obstetrician, resuscitator, neonatologist. They are ready for any succession of events, the benefit of modern clinics are equipped with everything that may be needed for both mother and baby. And if a woman has a chronic disease, believe me, a host of specialists will gather near her.
As for the baby, then you really shouldn't worry about him. He made a difficult, painful path through the birth canal in order to live. The midwife will take the baby, take the umbilical cord, wipe it, clean the mouth and nose, make sure that the heart beats well. Modern medicine works wonders. Who would have believed fifty years ago that it is possible to leave a baby born on a half term and weighing 500 grams? But nursed, and there is no sensation in this today. So why worry in advance for a full-term healthy baby?
Fear of death - This is generally from the field of phobias. More recently (in a historical context) women gave birth at home and even in the middle of a clean field. In such conditions - yes, there was something to be afraid of. Today? Sterile conditions, clean wards, experienced doctors who take several births per shift. No one will allow a woman to die!
In fact, a woman is not afraid of death, and uncertainty. Here again the psychological attitude is important. And you don’t need to listen to the woman’s gossip and horror stories, all this is complete nonsense. Neighbors, girlfriends, casual companions with their tips and stories, horror stories should be sent away. To calm down, it is not bad to work with positive affirmations, read the special literature, ask the doctor a question.
The strangest thing is that sometimes too careful study of a question may not calm, but, on the contrary, increase anxiety. Having read and seen too much, even I myself am a strong girl, saying “I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth”. So do not get hung up on too much information. And trust is only literate people and reliable sources.
I'm afraid of pregnancy and childbirth: common myths
There are plenty of birth myths. Some are so rooted in the mass consciousness that it is the time to open a prenatal educational program! Incorrect information often leads to the formation of fear when a woman is terribly afraid of pregnancy and childbirth. What to do? Refute!
1. Myth one: "To give birth is painful, very painful, always painful!“Calmly, without panic. It has already been said about the pain threshold. It remains to learn to minimize pain during childbirth. The first is to relieve the fear of the process. The fact is that fear most often“ lives ”in the stomach, numerous psychological studies indicate this. In addition, a woman subconsciously is not ready to accept changes in her life related to the appearance of a baby, the generic process can be delayed. Secondly, learn how to breathe correctly and remember poses in which pain is tolerated easier.
2. Myth two: "The maiden figure not to return, pregnancy will spoil her forever!"Complete nonsense. Weight gain during pregnancy ranges from five to 12 kilograms (unless, of course, you do not break into the grave and begin to specifically increase fat). All this can be easily removed after the birth of the child (again, if you do not start to eat off! The first three kilograms will go away already in the maternity hospital, the rest is a matter of time, exercises and diets. Therefore, the fear of “I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth because I will grow fat” has no objective grounds. Immediately after birth, you cannot go on a diet, you must feed the child first.
3. The third myth: "During pregnancy you can not do makeup, dye your hair and cut it". There is no evidence of the detrimental effect of cosmetic products on the development of the fetus. All cosmetics undergo strict control and are completely safe. But the oil paint, which the house management took to paint the walls of the entrance of a pregnant woman, is a real threat to the life of the child. Another thing is that changing the hormonal background may affect the structure of the hair, with the result that when dyeing instead of the expected shade you can get unexpected.
4. Myth Four: "Making love to a pregnant woman"Doctors claim that sex has a very beneficial effect on the physical and psychological state of both mother and child. It is necessary to limit intimacy only at the very beginning of pregnancy and in the last two months. Moreover, it is pregnant women who most often experience orgasm.
5. Myth Five: "Ultrasound can not be done, you can harm the child". Ultrasound examination is the most accurate and safe method of intrauterine examination of the fetus. It is carried out not to determine sex, but to identify possible developmental pathologies.
I'm afraid of pregnancy and childbirth, is it worth it?
Pregnancy is not a disease, but a completely natural state of a woman. It awakens the whole depth of her soul, gives a special beauty, comes self-confidence. A woman fulfills the destined, in this innermost essence of her coming into the world. The woman is the custodian of the clan, so to say “I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth” is by no means necessary.
Everything is really very simple. Nature has taken care to create the perfect mechanism for procreation. There is nothing dangerous in it, there is nothing to improve, add or subtract. Behind a woman in labor are thousands of her ancestors - mothers, grandmothers, sisters. Everything will end as it should: the birth of a healthy baby.
If a neighbor says that a pregnant woman has always toxicosis, that she eats pickles at night, pouring them with melted butter and sprinkling with a mixture of grated chocolate and cheese, do not believe it. All individually. Pregnancy often passes completely calmly, without any eating disorders.
Do not panic after visits to the doctor. The tests that pregnant women give are never perfect, because there are simply no healthy people in our world. Everything is within the normal range, therefore, after the women's consultation, the expectant mother goes home and not to the maternity hospital for preservation. Although there is nothing terrible about saving. If a pregnant woman needs medical help, you should not refuse it.
Give birth to everything, it is inevitable and there is nothing terrible about it. A pregnant woman should think not only about herself, but also about the baby, so she should, if possible, get rid of fears. It is important to understand that the child from the first days of her birth feels the mother, laughs with her mother, grieves, fears or rejoices. If you repeat “I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth” all the time, this may affect his physical and mental health. Feelings and behavior of the mother are of great importance for him and can affect childbirth. Calm happy woman and gives birth in the same way: easily and safely.
How not to be afraid of pregnancy and childbirth: the advice of psychologists
If a woman is very afraid of pregnancy and childbirth, she needs support and help. What do psychologists advise?
• There should be calm, emotionally stable stress-resistant people next to the woman.
• The ideal option is to agree in advance on childbirth with an experienced, reputable, trusting doctor, to get to know him better. This will relieve psychological stress, will remove most of the experiences, will give confidence that everything will be not just good - great!
• Sign up for courses for pregnant women, go through the preparation program for childbirth, to know what will happen and how. Communicate more with women in position, make plans, dream, talk about children.
• Make a list of necessary purchases and an action plan for each day of pregnancy. Start actively implement this plan. Time endlessly thinking "How am I afraid of pregnancy and childbirth!" just won't stay.
• Learn to relax, master the relaxation technique. It is not necessary to do this in paid groups: the necessary information can be obtained on the Internet.
• Wear bright, comfortable, beautiful clothes. All the talk about what you need to dress in rags, wash off makeup and do not come across anyone's eyes leave on the conscience of advisers.
• To equip the house, decorate it with cute little things, fresh flowers - to receive moral and physical pleasure from the place where the waiting for childbirth takes place and where the baby will grow.
• Ask your husband to massage the lower back and feet. If she refuses or does not know how, invite a masseuse.
• Drink light herbal teas with a calming effect (after consulting a doctor!)
• Indulge in pleasant spa treatments and generally get the most out of life!
How to prepare the body to not be afraid of pregnancy and childbirth
Nine months is a long enough period to take care of the physical condition of your body and teach it to work properly during childbirth. This, by the way, will help you to feel confident, to get rid of fears, to forget about panic thoughts like “I am afraid of pregnancy and childbirth, help!”
Required strengthen your abdominal and pelvic muscles, make the spine flexible and the joints mobile. A great option is to master the Kegel exercise. If the muscles are trained, then the labor will be faster, and contractions will be less painful.
Yoga for pregnant women, swimming, water aerobics welcome, but only after consulting a doctor.
Abdominal breathing technique help give birth less painful.
Nutrition of a pregnant woman should be full, with the obligatory inclusion of intestinal-stimulating products: cereals, vegetables, whole-grain and bran bread.
To prepare the chest, to make the nipples less sensitive, should be rubbed with a hard towel after a contrast shower. You can wipe the nipples with ice cubes with a decoction of oak bark.
You need to sleep at least eight hours a day.. Daily walks are a must.
After the 36th week of pregnancy you can not use a condom during intimacy. This will help prepare the uterus for childbirth.
If a woman prepares for the birth of the baby, his birth will be easy and natural. Yes, almost everyone is afraid of pregnancy and childbirth, and this is normal. However, one should not attach too much importance to the process of childbirth, be afraid of pain in advance, think up some problems for oneself.
Nature is wise, and her greatest gift is the birth of man.
